Why Didn’t They Tell Us Happiness Is a Choice?
A few of the lessons time teaches us are difficult to accept. The biggest is probably that the most important, wonderful, and influential people in our lives will sometimes be taken away from us. Older folks will tell you that you never get over the pain of losing a loved one. You try to focus on all that person’s great memories and good qualities. I experienced this in 2023 when my wife passed and I am still experiencing the loss.
In other words, you choose to focus on good things rather than obsess over not having that person in your life anymore. You make a choice. Instead of reacting, you take a proactive approach. You act on the memory of that person positively rather than negatively. Even though the emptiness prevails, my focusing on the wonderful 45 years we shared helps fill that void.
Another Choice You Can Make in Life Is to Be Happy or to Be Sad Most of the Time
The earlier in life you can figure this out, the better. This knowledge doesn’t come to everyone. You may know someone who doesn’t realize that happiness is a choice. Some people live their entire lives embracing negativity and believing that the world is out to get them.
Let’s imagine for a second that you are that type of person.
Nothing good ever happens to you. If it does, it’s by pure chance. Life will certainly return to its old routine of knocking you down and kicking you while you’re there. Every person, thing, and experience you encounter will undoubtedly cause stress, strife, sadness, and other negative emotions.
Living life as this poor soul, one day, your company decides to part ways with you. You’re fired. It’s not that you were a particularly terrible employee. It’s just that the company is downsizing, and you’ve got to go. This doesn’t surprise you, of course. The passage of time has taught you repeatedly that you are the whipping boy of the universe.
Now Imagine for a Moment That, for the First Time in Your Life, You Realize You Have a Choice
You can view this as just another of the many mistreatments life has dealt you. Or you can look at this as a wonderful opportunity. Now you’ve got time to start that project you’ve always dreamed about. You see the silver lining in the cloud rather than just another rainy day.
We all have choices. Every day we’re given the ability to steer our life in any direction we desire. We can accept that life is tough and there’s not much sense in making an effort. Or we can now decide to take action and start doing the things that give us meaning and purpose. Don’t live most of your life and discover that you can choose to be or feel anything you want. That’s your choice right now. Embrace that idea and start living your best life today.
And also, continue to grow the Love Affair With Yourself
P.S. The image used for this article is a sign my wife painted for our neighborhood a few years ago. She spent her life focused on being happy despite her health conditions
Enjoyed reading this. Thank you Chuck for posting. Hope you are doing better. One of the hardest things is to lose a loved one. Expecally a-loving spouse. You know I didn’t know Shirley was the one who painted this. We Chose To Be Happy.
I have some of Shirley’s stuff inside and outside my home. And In my driveway . Stay strong Chuck. Oh how do you like Texas life.
Really appreciate your comment, Dianna,
Shirley wanted the neighborhood to “Be Happy” regardless the tough stuff we may encounter on this Journey. It is our CHOICE to choose Happiness or Sadness
Two things I read here touched me. Loss of a loved one and loss of a job. I lost my “job for life” when the factory I worked in closed. It seemed to set a trend of shorter terms of employment for a number of years. I got used to moving on when I became a Class A commercial driver’s license holder with double and triple trailer, tanker and Haz-Mat endorsements. Getting that next job usually took less than a week.
The other thing is dealing with the loss of a loved one. I struggled with the loss of my brother for quite some time. His being the first close death I experienced found me ill prepared for the grieving process. With little to no advice I found deep sadness every time he crossed my mind. Somewhere in time I began to smile at certain memories and that started a true healing in my heart. Today I look back on a brother with a lot of love for his family, a sense of humor that knew no boundaries and a big brother’s life full of good examples.
Writing this and other pieces not shared always help adjust my perspective on life. That you give me the opportunity is mu” appreciated.
Be well Chuck, enjoy that which you can, smile at the memories as you can. Shirley is with you, you will make certain of that. Be at peace.
As always, Walt, your insight and friendship are so welcomed.
Interesting that is so many ways our lives have followed similar paths.
Continue on your chosen path to Happiness.
Thanks for being you!
Thank you for the reminder Chuck. It took me until a major catastrophe in my mid 50s to really understand that happiness is a choice.
Although I now earn far less, no longer have expensive cars and the affluent lifestyle that I had before, I have learned that it takes very little material stuff to be happy.
If one chooses to be happy no matter the circumstances.
I always appreciate your wisdom, Peter. has not always provided Happiness
Although having sufficient income does allow a for a comfortable lifestyle, “chasing the dollar” has not always provided HAPPINESS.
We are blessed with the God given opportunity to CHOOSE that Happiness.