Why is Independence Important?

Now that we know what independence is, it’s time to turn our attention to the question of WHY independence is important. There is a very good reason why understanding the importance of independence is critical to self-sufficiency. As with anything, a deep grasp of a concept does nothing to promote the importance of that concept on a personal level. There has to be a way of “translating” an understanding of the concept so that it resonates deeply and vitally. In our case, that deeper connection comes from the second way that independence is commonly defined.

Independence is alternatively defined as “not depending on another for livelihood or sustenance”. This definition, in eight words, clearly explains why personal independence is so important to success and security in life. The key, once again, lies in a balance of competing interests.

If you depend on someone else, no matter who that person might be, for your livelihood or sustenance, then that person exercises an unacceptable degree of control over your personal freedom. No matter their intentions, they have the ability to cut you off from everything that you need to survive. In other words, they hold your life in their hands. As an absolute position, this is unacceptable.

However, as we discussed above, there are no absolutes when it comes to independence. In reality, no one can exercise total control over any one individual. Still, situations can exist where, for one reason or another, one person can delimit the freedom of another to act in ways that cause negative results.

For example, when you were a child, your parents quite literally held almost total control over your livelihood and sustenance. Yet, this nearly total control was far from negative. It was a necessity. At that point in your life, you were unable to care for yourself. Your very survival depended upon your parents caring for your needs.

However, as you grew, you developed the skill sets necessary to provide you with a livelihood and sustenance. You got an education. With experience and training, you became qualified for gainful employment. You acquired the ability to cook, clean, pay bills, groom, dress and make rational decisions about how to use your time. In short, you became an adult, with all the interdependence and independence that comes with being grown up.

This means that there are times when you seek the help of others and times when others seek your help. Equally, there are times when you have to rely on your own knowledge, experience, and intuition to get by.

The key here, once again, is a balance.

Personal independence depends a lot on personal responsibility to function efficiently and effectively. For example, if a friend asks you for your help moving into a new home, you have the freedom to refuse the request. However, the reason why you refuse to help makes all the difference in how you are using your independence.

If you have a previous commitment that you feel you have to honor, then refusing your friend’s request for help is a reasonable use of your independence. On the other hand, refusing to help your friend move because you don’t feel like going to the trouble to help is eminently unreasonable. Why? Because the unreasonable refusal to help expands your independence at the expense of someone you call a friend. In other words, the balance between independence and control has been skewed because of your social irresponsibility.

Let’s look at another example.

In a personal relationship, the balance between independence and control is both extremely important and capable of becoming greatly imbalanced. When you are emotionally close to another person, the lines between the two of you can become blurred. Affection can lend itself to the removal of barriers and the lowering of personal guards that are tightly in place in other situations. In such a case, one party to the relationship can begin to exercise undue control over the other party. They can attempt to limit activities and behaviors that the other party has every right to engage in. While quasi-abusive behavior is not usually considered independent behavior, it is, nonetheless, dependent upon the other party surrendering a portion of their rightful autonomy. In other words, control can only occur when independence is surrendered.

These examples show very clearly why personal independence is so important. Without it, we are doomed to rely on others, and their whims, for our every need. With too much of it, we risk trampling on the independence of those around us. It’s only when mutual interdependence is practiced that a balance is achieved and everyone has the equal ability to live a self-determined life.

Sadly, independence seems to be a shrinking virtue in today’s world. Some claim that independence is nothing more than another name for selfishness. Those who exhibit independence are labeled as egotists, concerned with nothing more than satisfying their shallow wants and needs. Independence is blamed for the atomized society that we live in where, increasingly, traditionally communal activities are performed as a personal ritual.

Nothing is less true.

Independence is neither self-centered nor selfish. Another word for independence is autonomy which, in the original Greek, means self-rule. As we have seen, real independence doesn’t mean making up your own set of rules in contravention to the rules of society and nature. However, it also doesn’t mean blindly following the dictates of any external authority. Instead, independence requires that we use our own reason and experience to not only set our own rules of behavior but also to judge the veracity of the rules that are imposed upon us from outside. Independence is understanding why something is true, as opposed to believing that it is true because a figure of authority stated that it was so. In short, independence is a sign of rationality and a rational mind.

Therefore, a truly independent person is not someone who does whatever they want. Instead, an independent person understands what it is they want to do and why they want to do it. Independence is not about following whims. Doing so would be about as logical as deciding that pigs could fly. Instead, independence is about behaving rigorously. It is about having standards and sticking to them. Above all, it is about discovering the truths of the world by yourself and then living a life styled upon those truths. There is no isolation in being independent. It is the most social of acts. It requires an interconnectedness to exist and to continue to exist. Each of us is required to bring to the table our strengths that we can then use to help others. Likewise, others bring their strengths to the table so that they can help us. This is the very definition of a healthy relationship, one built on trust, strength, rationality, and compassion. This is the reason why independence is so important and why it is such a critical component of a complete life.

Other Reasons Independence is Important:

• It boosts your sense of self-worth
• It decreases the burden on the people around you
• You get to control your own destiny
• Learn more about your strengths and weaknesses
• It can make you happier and more fulfilled
• It sets you up for further growth
• You make better decisions
• Gives you a sense of freedom

Next Chapter >>>>>>

Your Thoughts?
I would really appreciate your input or sharing of personal experiences on these points

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